Choosing all or nothing is a poor man’s mentality.

How many times you’ve seen yourself or others say that they want all or nothing. This theme is so reoccurring in everyday life that I decided to write this passage on it to provide my own experiences.

In short I think that being so maximalistic in most situations just shows weakness of character and inflexibility of one’s mind. This leads to inability of a person to have incremental progress in the area of their undertaking. Finally, it results in that person not making any progress because the world doesn’t match his/her perfect picture and opportunities get rejected. That person stays emotionally, financially, mentally or spiritually poor. That mindset can affect all areas of life.

Let’s go through a few examples. When given more responsibility at work a person might view it as an opportunity to prove himself and to be promoted afterwards. A negative mindset will look for excuses like more workload or no pay increase. Another example is: successful businessmen view crisis as an opportunity rather than a reason to blame the government.

When you play chess you calculate tactics all the time but your game strategy is guided by vague principles like piece development, center control, king safety, space, etc. You believe in these principles and able to sense when they are being violated. Experienced players notice a disbalance and know that’s the time to look for tactics and they usually find them.

Believing in abundance of opportunities in life is very similar. You know if you are doing right things opportunities will come. “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity” [Seneca].

How ‘positive mindset’ idea connects to other popular ones? In my mind there is no magic in the universe that will make things happen for you. However if you keep your eyes open by having a positive outlook you’ll notice lots of opportunities aligned with your goals. There are many roads that lead to the place you hope to reach but none of them is a straight line. Making choices and going forward is the only way to get to that goal or, perhaps, discover another worthy one.

“The Secret” is a popular movie and book that argues that according to law of attraction you can change reality with your thoughts. I think it portrays things in somewhat magical or religious way without explaining the mechanism beneath. Nonetheless, I believe the main point is true. If you believe in something it will be easier for it to manifest itself in your life. Your mind will subconsciously look for anything related to the topic you have interest in. It’s probably a form of priming.

Mindfulness is an old spiritual practice that saw renowned interest from C-level executives and high level performers. It has a lot to offer but one of the biggies is an ability to be aware of your own thoughts. You get to better control negative thoughts, worries and distractions by staying in the moment and reminding yourself not to get distracted. Removing clutter from your thoughts and helping yourself to realign with what’s important and relevant can boost your productivity and improve quality of your life. To me the main value of mindfulness is in cutting down on noisy (negative, worrisome, fearful, etc) thoughts and in being able to stay in present and actually live your life rather than run on auto-pilot.

Being grateful helps to reaffirm your actions. The target might be far away and it’s hard to stay motivated. It’s essential to be happy along the way. A practice of loving kindness might help to switch your thinking from warrior to more appreciative and caring mindset. I think it’s good to oscillate between Ying-Yang to be able to achieve goals and also to have time to enjoy them and to recover.

To summarize: positive attitude creates opportunities and helps to make incremental progress that leads to success. Believing in success is essential to being able to spot and accept those small opportunities. The path is never clear but it’s there to be discovered.